It seems a majority of guys get into the art and science of seduction thinking they have to master the entire art, one skill at at time. This seems like a reasonable approach: Master
approaching, master getting her into you, master getting her phone number (haha and this is often completely unnecessary), master getting her back to your place, etc.
However, this is not optimal.
Why?
Because if you're going about it this way, you will not be getting results in the interim because you are "front-loading" your practice. Then you don't get laid for months or years and you end
up massively frustrated.
What’s the point of being a master of only starting a conversation if you can’t also get her in the sack later too!? Well, the truth is, there are only 5 prerequisites to sex and if you can do each of them, even at a half-assed, average level, you will get laid!
Yes, you heard that correctly. You don't have to be an absolute master to be getting laid regularly. You only have to be passable at 5 things. But let me explain further, you have to be able to perform ALL 5 Prereqs. Miss even one of them…even if you performed the other four at a mastery level…and you don't get laid! And nothing leads to burnout faster than being stuck with a massive case of blue balls night after night because you perform a couple of the Prereqs exceptionally and suck at the other few.
All right, at this point I know you want to know what the 5 Prereqs are. Without further adieu….
The 5 Prerequisites for Sex
1. Approach Her
2. Escalate on Her
3. Screen for Logistics
4. Bait Her to Invest
5. Go to a Discreet Location
Approach Her
Every poll I have conducted of my email list inquiring what guys most want to know has always resulted in a majority wanting to know how to approach and start a successful interaction. I think
this is a reasonable desire, but often misguided.
Here's the truth about approaching: Approaching is simultaneously the most Important part of the seduction, and the least important part. A paradox, for sure, but let me further unravel this conundrum. It's the most important aspect because, if you are not approaching any women, you are left to whatever women happen to be pursuing you. Which means, at best, you're able to hook up with
girls you would rather not be, but more likely you are hooking up with no one.
Women are not socially conditioned to approach men. Hell, the best that even a highly desirable male sex symbol like GeorgeClooney or Brad Pitt could hope for in the average bar or nightclub is to have a bunch of nervous girls hovering nearby in hopesthat he will approach them.
If you want to have an abundance of women in your life, and you want to be seducing the kind of women you have become so accustomed to merely fantasizing about, you must approach them!
But the good news is…Your openers don't have to be spectacular, dazzling, or even mildly amusing.
The most important part of approaching is that you actually do it. Approaching merely gets you into an interaction so you can.
How To Get Laid Tonight! Apply the seduction tools necessary (more on those in a moment) to get the woman in bed. No more, no less. A lot of guys spend a lot of mental energy trying to concoct the
perfect opener to have a girl completely enamored from the very moment he opens his mouth…and since they have yet to devise what this magical opener is, they stand at the end of the bar with a beer pressed against their chests, wishing the girl would just approach them. Guess what? If such a "magical opener" actually exists, I don't know what it is. In fact, my favorite openers are neither witty, clever, nor do they have her wanting to suck my cock from the very beginning. That doesn't matter.
Opening merely gets me talking to a girl, and once I have the interaction going, I can apply the true skills of seduction.
How to be instantly mediocre at Approaching: Force yourself to approach girls. The only thing that works as far as getting over your irrational fear of approaching women (and yes, it is completely irrational), is brute force. But I find it helpful to look at it this way: Ask yourself, what's the
worst thing that will happen if you approach her? In truth, the worst thing that will happen is you're not gonna be able to bang her.
Guess what!? You' re al ready NOT banging her! This means that your "worst case scenario" can only remain areality should you foolishly choose not to actually approach her.
How To Get Laid Tonight! You're already at your lowest point! It's all gravy from here on out,
if you wisely choose to just do the simple act of walking up and saying "Hey…" (Yes, merely saying "Hey" or "Hi" to a girl you find attractive truly is sufficient to check this Prereq off the list!)
Escalate On Her
Without Escalation, you will end up in the all-too-familiar "friend zone". You have to get her turned on if you want to fuck her. Escalation is quite simply, amplifying whatever her current sexual arousal is and directing that arousal towards you. The awesome thing is there are many ways you can do this.
There is no "One True Path" to getting her sexually aroused. You could use any of the following tools and more:
• Set Sexual Frames
• Maintain Sexual Tension
• Inoculate Against Her Objections
• Escalate 3-Dimensionally
• Escalate physically (i.e. Kino Escalation)
• Use Sexual Languaging
• And many other tools revealed in the entire Same Night
Seduction Academy….
Mastery of this means that you can transition effortlessly from one tool to the next and use the right tool at the right time because you have developed a heightened sense of "calibration"
BUT…
You can very often get laid using only one tool, and to this day, I still will often only use one tool to get incredibly hot women into a bar. A story: I met a girl once and quickly got her number. The
interaction was nothing even worthy of writing about on your favorite forum, nor bragging to your wing about. I simply got her number.
I invited her to join us for a night of adventure watching my favorite (free) show in Las Vegas, Steel Panther! Because the initial interaction was so mediocre, I wasn't even sure if she was actually going to show up, but she did show up… with another dude! No worries, I was determined to just have fun and see where the night took us, but I knew I needed to act fast if I wanted anything to happen with this girl, so I quickly said one thing to her and then played it normal the rest of the night. (I will tell you what that one thing is in a moment…)
The epilogue to the story is that she had the guy she came with drive her to my house after the show and I banged her in my room while Epik got the guy drunk in the other room…all the while he was wondering where his girl went! I kid you not, I only did one little thing to escalate in this entire interaction
How to be instantly mediocre at Escalation:
I know you're wondering, "What was the one thing I said to her that shaped the entire night?"
To understand what I did, you need to understand this simple principle: "The trajectory of the interaction is often determined by the first few moments of the interaction" After you have approached her you really need to start getting her to view you as a sexual potential not just some other random
dude there to entertain her for the night…or worse, be her friend that she can complain about how all the guys she's actually fucking are jerks!
I won't get into the actual mechanics of Sexual Framing, which is what I used in this interaction, because honestly you don't need to get this to work! Here's the line: "You know what…you seem like a really nice girl…but I detect a serious naughty side!" It may not sound like much, and this line is accepted almost universally by women, but by her accepting this, she now "felt permission" to behave naughty around me. And naughty she was…the entire night! So to become instantly mediocre at Escalation, start by saying that line early in every conversation and you will notice a marked
shift in her demeanor, often hurtling you down the path towards sex!
Here is the line one more time: "You know what…you seem like a really nice girl…but I detect a serious naughty side!"
Screen For Logistics
Ask yourself, what is the biggest cock-block you face? If you're like most guys, you will respond, "Her fat-ass troll of a friend who pulls her away from you just as things are starting to go well in the interaction." A more "enlightened" response might be to say, "your self is the biggest cock-block, holding you from being with the girl you desire". (To this, I would respond, "Yes, you probably ARE the biggest cock-block out there…I'll be sure to avoid you when I see you in the bar tonight!") :p
In truth, none of these responses are correct. The biggest cockblock you face is "Time".
You have lost more potential ass to this pernicious cock-block than anything else that seems to be keeping your dick dryer than the sidewalk in Las Vegas on a hot summer day. You only have a finite amount of time to approach and seduce a woman.
How to be instantly mediocre at Screening for Logistics:
Start figuring out what her logistical situation is in the first few minutes of all interactions by asking the 5 logistical questions:
1. Who are you here with?
2. How do you know each other?
The first two questions are interrelated because women rarely go to the bar alone, so you need to find out who is with her and what the relationship status between them is. (Note: If a woman IS at a bar alone, she is as strong a candidate for Same Night Seduction as you can find. Start escalating the
interaction!) If she is at the bar with her boyfriend, it is going to be extremely unlikely that you will be able to take her home. It is not completely impossible to do, but you’re typically much better off getting her number and continuing her seduction later. There will be better candidates available.
Even if a girl is there on a “first date” with a guy she isn’t all that into, it is going to be tricky to arrange the logistics to bang her that night. Get her number discreetly and move on.
Always get in the habit of asking how everyone in the group knows each other. Often the guys in the group are just coworkers, friends, boyfriends of one of your target’s friends, or just some guy who is unsuccessfully trying to game your target.
3. How did you get here? You need to know what the transportation situation is. If she drove
herself there, you will be more able to pull her to your home later using the tactics outlined in this book. If she came with a bunch of her girlfriends, which is often the case on girl’s night, it may be harder for you to pull her home that night (“We came together, we’re leaving together!”), especially if she drove them. She may have to drop her friends off at their houses at the end of the night or they may judge her if she leaves with a guy she just met at the bar instead of leaving with them.
If she drove them, the best way to handle the logistics is to get her “Sexually Ready” by escalating and baiting her to invest (more on Baiting to Invest in a moment!), then arrange to meet up with her after she drops her friends off. This is, however, a risky move because she is likely to lose state while she is dropping her friends off as she gets more tired, alcohol/drugs start wearing off, friends talk her out of it on the drive.
This is why it is important to also win over her group of friends.Getting their support will make it easier to have good logistics later. If they like you, they will not try to talk her out of meeting up with you later while driving them home, or in the case that she rode with one of her friends to the venue, they won’t mind her leaving with you instead. I like to get her friend’s permission to hang out with my desired girl later that night. Say something like, “Lisa and I like each other and want to hang out later tonight, you guys are welcome to join us, but is it cool with you if she comes with me?” Extending a “token invitation” for her friends to join also helps alleviate their safety concerns for their friend and adds plausible deniability to our intentions to hook up later. Most savvy women will not take you up on the offer to join and will give their approval of you hanging out if you have won them over.
Approaching groups with guys and girls is great for taking her home the night you meet her. There is a much greater likelihood that she drove herself there to meet up with her friends and coworkers than
if she is there with only her girlfriends. Get in the habit of approaching groups with both guys and girls in it.
4. What are your plans for later? This is as the closest thing to a secret code for “Do you want to
fuck later?” a guy can use. Best-case scenario, she will ask you what you are doing later. This means she wants to hang out with you later (and is likely trying to covertly tell you she wants to hook up). This only happens on occasion, but if she says this consider it a major green light to escalate the situation and get her home ASAP. Most of the time she will say, “I don’t know” which is a neutral
response and you should still continue gathering information. If you play things right she is likely open to hanging out later when she says this, but she may have to be somewhere later and you
need to know this. Occasionally she will say she has to go to bed early for whatever reason. She may have to get up early for work in the morning, she may have to go to class, she may be the “early to bed, early to rise” type, or she may just be saying she has to go to bed. Tease her for saying she has to go to bed (“yeah you probably DO need some serious beauty rest, goofball”), but find out her
reasons. And that is why you need to ask the next logistical question:
What time do you have to get up in the morning? If she has to get up at 4:30 in the morning to go to work, no amount of game is likely to persuade her to go home with you that night. The later she has to get up the following morning, the better
Bait Her To Invest
Her investment in the interaction is the "yin" energy to your "yang" energy of Escalating on her. You want to get her to put effort into the interaction, and thus get her invested. Because when a woman invests in the interaction, she will backwards rationalize that not only does she like you now, but she
has ALWAYS liked you! (Even if initially, this wasn't actually the case!) Women don't invest in interactions that aren't important or with guys they don't like, but awesomely, the converse is also true so I'll say it again: If you can get a woman to invest in the interaction, she will backwards rationalize that she is doing this because she likes you and wants to be with you!
How to be instantly mediocre at Baiting To Invest You can take things she has already done, and frame that as her investing in the interaction! This is called "Hijacking". So for example, say she is wearing nice stilettos in the club, which is fairly regular occurrence. You could take her wearing these
stilettos as her investing in you. Here's the secret: Stilettos hurt girls feet! (This is why you will
often see "less sophisticated" girls carrying them in their hands by the end of the night). But the woman also knows that the same shoes that hurt like hell to wear, ALSO make her thighs and ass look incredible! Here's what to say to "Hijack" her investment after looking down and noticing her awesome stilettos:
"I like your shoes, and you know what? I know your feet must really be throbbing right now, but as a guy I want to thank you for wearing them, because they are helping accentuate those awesome thighs and that cute butt of yours. So thank you for doing that…for me!" The funny thing is that she already wore those shoes before I talked to her, but I can still take that and frame it as an investment in me because, in truth, she actually DID wear them for me! She came to the bar wanting to meet an awesome dude, so she wore these uncomfortable shoes to help attract that guy. By saying this, she will recognize that she did in fact wear these for you, and backwards rationalize that she always liked you. "Hijacking" is but one of many ways to bait a girl into investing, but it's potent. To be instantly mediocre at Baiting her to Invest, look for any sort of thing she did already, and frame that as her having done it for you.
Go To A Discreet Location
You have to get her out of the bar and into your bed if you want to fuck her. Prima facie, this seems completely obvious, but so many guys fumble this one up. They've done all of this work escalating on her, getting her to invest, then don't be a man and take this girl home with them! What a waste!
At this point, the "hard part" is already done. You just need to get her home! So I'm going to make this as simple for you as it actually is and show you a way to increase her odds of wanting to go home with you.
How to be instantly mediocre at Going to a Discreet Location Early in the interaction you want to "Light The Fuse". What is lighting the fuse? It's where you set up what you are going to use as a (non-sexual) excuse to go to a place where sex can realistically happen (i.e. your house or apartment).
Have something cool at your house that you can take her to do. It could be a hookah, it could be a Nintendo Wii, it could be that amazing view of the city (which is in reality a dirty parking lot
littered with hobos…because that's the real city!) It doesn't really matter. You just need to give her "plausible deniability" for her conscious mind to grasp onto, so she can rationalize that she's not a "slut" for going back to your house.
She is, after all, only going there to smoke hookah! But a key to "Lighting the Fuse". You don't want to invite her when you initially bring it up because that would seem a little out of place and needy early on. You also want to reward her "good behavior" later with an invitation to "see the view"!
So when you initially bring it up, just talk about what it is, and how awesome it is. Feel free to oversell this a bit, because you're not trying to convince her to go at the moment. You're just trying to
get the thought of you and her doing this implanted in her mind so it can simmer in the back of her thoughts.
Here's what I say using my hookah for an example: "You know what!? Here I am talking to you, and I'm having such a great time but truly I'm thinking about this new hookah I just got. It has an ice chamber just beneath the bowl and it produces the smoothest, most mellow smoke ever! It's so relaxing…wait, what were you saying again?"
…And the fuse is lit!
Now later in the interaction after you know her logistics are good, you've escalated, and she has invested in the interaction, it's time to invite her to do whatever you lit the fuse. Tel l her, "You know what? You're awesome! I'm having such a great time and I don't want this night to end. Let's go smoke
hookah!" Then grab her by the hand and start leading her out the door. If you have done all the other Prereqs, she will have a very high likelihood of going with you, right there and then!
And truly getting laid really only comes down to two factors:
1. Can I get her to a place where sex can realistically occur?
2. And when she's there, can we both be somewhat turned on? If you can manage those 2 factors, you will get laid! Accomplishing each of the 5 Prereqs for Sex will send you down the path towards sex.
And remember do all of these at a mediocre level and you will seduce women like crazy! Do only 4 out of 5 of them (even at a master level), and you can plan on a using two kleenex every night (one to clean up the mess and one for the tears).
Point is, work on getting all areas at a mediocre level first, then simultaneously improve each skill incrementally and you will be getting laid like a champ. And really, it doesn't take much to go from a complete fuck-tard with women to mediocre in all 5 skills, if you just commit yourself to doing it.
Get out there and do it, and you will be getting laid far more consistently than you ever have before with minimal effort. Get Some!
By Nick Roger
